What TV’s most nervous characters can teach us

“Make sure I don’t know what pathetic.” –George Costanza

My comfort show “Seinfeld” featured George Costanza, perhaps one of the most nervous characters in television history. Ironically, his lack Emotional regulationself-doubt, Fraud syndromeand the blatant lack of coping skills is all extreme, that’s exactly what it is. Neuropathy It makes him very familiar.

As a TV character, George is hilarious and ridiculous. But in a psychological sense, we all have some Costanzas inside. Some Nonetheless, George. After all, this is what makes the artistic medium so familiar to the human condition. We see some of ourselves in the story.

“I have to be liked!”

So what was about George that was such a mirror about the human experience? First of all, he has no shortage of self-doubt.

We all experience some self-doubt. But for George, it’s too much to endure.

Always seeking validation, in true Costanza fashion, he often takes it to ridiculous extremes. When he discovers that his best friend, Jerry’s girlfriend, doesn’t like him, George, for example, ends up saying, “Yes! Yes! Everyone has to like me. I have to like him!”

We all have a very human need for the verification and acceptance of others, but most of us can address the fact that we are not actually liked, verified or accepted by anyone. Of course, in the case of Costanza, this is taken to an unrealistic and unreasonable extreme: Must do I’ll like it everyone. The ability to accept and deal with the idea that not everyone will like you is something that makes you more adaptive and mature than George.

“No one loses as big as me.”

What George Costanza is low Self-esteem It could be an understatement of the century. Again and again, he uses adjectives such as “pathetic”, “neurotic”, and “inadequate” to degrade, reduce, beg, and ineffect himself.

In one episode, when he breaks up with his ex-girlfriend, he points out that it’s not her fault and that George is not the one who is rebelliously answering. This kind of persistence, negative and harsh self-description embeds a highly critical and hateful sense of self. George carries this story as “pathetic” throughout the series, and comes to define him.

People who are more self-reflective and cognitively flexible may recognize that this type of self-description is useless, inaccurate and can be challenged and altered to build self-esteem. But George’s acceptance of this job is to deny and betray his own beliefs.

“My life is the complete opposite of everything I want.”

George Costanza has the unique and essential ability to exploit the psychological defense mechanism of “division” and see things in rigid, all or no meaningful terms. Rather than realizing that a part of his life is actually positive, he automatically jumps to conclusions such as “Every decision I’ve made so far was wrong in my entire life.”

This is a pretty good rating every The single decision was wrong. He naturally follows this conclusion with unrealistic behavioral reactions. He now does the complete opposite of all instincts. This appears to be working for a while, but of course it backfires partly due to the irrational and unsustainable nature of the behavior.

Maybe a more appropriate person can identify Some Thinking and actions that were not in their best interest without taking all views. However, this requires a thoughtful and self-simultaneous approach, which of course is not actually the operandi of the George Costanza.

“What am I scared of? I’m scared of the same thing as you.

The term “neuropathy” has been used less than before, but it is perhaps the most accurate way to describe George. It is defined as over anxietyworry, obsession, words encapsulate George’s presence, his way of thinking, and his actions.

His state of nature is one of worries, fixation, anti-mission, obsession. He struggles to control invasive thoughts, adaptively deal with worries, and regulate behavioral responses to his emotions. This often leads to him making poor decisions and to behave habitually in socially unacceptable ways I’m lyingand get in his own way.

When we learn to deal with it in a worrying and healthy way, we limit the use of maladaptive or unhealthy behavioral responses. Of course, this makes for less interesting characters, but in real life it can help you navigate the ups and downs of life.

What you can learn from George Costanza

So, what can we learn from George, the self-proclaimed “dumb lord”?

• A little self-compassion can go a long way. George is proof that when you say a negative story to yourself (“I’m pathetic”) long enough, it starts to feel factual and becomes more difficult to challenge or change. Healthy individuals have the ability to reflect their self-stories, identify useless and inaccurate things, and work to change them.
• Relying on external verification is not healthy. George really seems to lack the ability to be kind to himself. His self-acceptance seems to depend on the opinions of others. He is overly important what others think about him, which continues to feed his neurosis and reduce his self-esteem. One thing he can’t do is find an internal verification. It’s a healthy way to reassure you that you don’t just rely on other people’s feedback.
• Life never exists only this or only that. Splitting, reliable Defense mechanism For George, we lead us to take strict and inaccurate views of our lives. Recognizing the nuances of life and nebulae is how we deal with the inevitable challenges of life. George is unable to see life in this more flexible way, resulting in a constant, difficult battle and a lower response to situations than health.
• The response of behavior may be thoughtful. George tends to not really think about his reaction to his worries and anxiety. Of course, this creates some of the show’s more hilarious moments, but in reality, this only causes unnecessary disruption in our lives. Take more Mindful And our reflexive view of the problem helps us respond in a healthy and adaptive way.