Meaningless inevitability | Today’s psychology

We usually don’t stop asking about the nature of meaning in our lives until meaning breaks up. Most of us build the lives we want, hoping that adversity will not lead to the loss of what we have created. Often it is a certain amount of loss to remind us where our meaning lived. A meaning crisis has the power to point out what is really important.

I worked with many clients to discover meaning amidst a crisis of meaning. Here are some examples:

• Pete attended a boys weekend retreat, but his wife, Kate, encouraged him. He believed that the weekend would strengthen him. marriage. Upon arriving at the house, he finds a note informing him that his wife has moved to live with his best friend Andrew.
• Philip went home with his son Colin after visiting the university where Colin is scheduled to attend in the fall. A head-on collision causes Philip to be present in the ICU and Colin is dead.
• Marlene woke up to find her husband’s inactive body due to a fatal heart attack. Marlene is entrusted to three sons, ages 4, 6 and 10.

Pete, Philip and Marlene faced great losses and with it they faced a crisis of meaning. Existential psychotherapist Irvin Yarom suggests that such a crisis is driven by four questions: Why am I here? Am I important? Considering the inevitability of death, can life really mean? Of course, these questions generally involve feelings of distress. angerdespair, sadness, despair. When a person translates a question into a statement, they may have heavy emotional weight. I have no problem. There is no purpose. Life is completely out of my control and death dismisses life as true meaning. Such statements may require you to seek professional support.

Pete pinned him Treatment In the question: How much control do I actually control my life? Pete’s concerns stem from feeling betrayed by his wife and life. After a considerable amount of medical work, Pete’s anger began to sink. He also said, before he was betrayed, Magical Thoughts. All he had to do was a good guy, honest, kind, helpful, and good things happen to him. He was willing to let go of his magical thoughts, so he forgive Life has allowed him to overcome a crisis of meaning.

Philip’s crisis was energised by questions. Why am I here? After Colin’s death, Philip could not imagine a purposeful life. Philip’s sorrow Carrying heavy weight of sadness on the scale of depression. His only life-affirming activity was to ride a long bike. It soon became clear that he and his son often rode a bike together. I suggested that he might be riding a bike and hanging from Colin. I encouraged him to build a small altar in his house. There he was able to sit for 20 minutes every day to honor who Colin was and who he was. Philip continued to commit to the all night he performed at the altar every day. He had so many purposes. Finally, he looked at me and realized, “Corin’s sister was my purpose.

Marlene’s crisis sat firmly: How can life make sense if this death is unpredictable and inevitable? Marlene was deeply hopeless and lost. She was so emotionally contracted that she didn’t allow her friends or relatives to support her. I suggested that she might not be ready to get help, but her boy might. She seemed ready to allow those who trusted to support her son. She thanked the boy for the generous support he was given. she Thanks Opened her heart and her vision. She said, “I was blaming death for taking away the meaning of my life. I realized that the forced busyness had deepened me into the future and compromised my existence. The meaning of my life was waiting to be reclaimed.”

Meaning manufacturer

Pete, Philip and Marlene are very similar to the rest of us, finding meaning within the meaninglessness. The spiritual blows of tragedy and loss cannot be eliminated. But we can get closer to questions that create meaning. As meaning makers, we can create meaning without waiting for a meaning crisis.

“How much of my life is actually in my control?” The more you enjoy this question, the more you will have opportunities to refine your life with the words of life. I recommend that you consider living in prayer of tranquility. wisdom To know the difference. ”

“Why are you here?” It’s a great question to reflect on rather than trying to answer urgently. It’s too easy to get prey to scrambling for purposes. It’s like a scramble to protect true love. There are too many scrambles. It helps us to accept our purpose and calling. If you pay NoteThere are ways in life that are beneficial.

“Are there any problems?” Whenever we face too many unknowns, we either default to this question or decide that we are not important. We don’t have to wait for a crisis of meaning to update the truth that we matter. I have come to believe in the power of humility as the best way to make sure we are important. We promise to embrace our strengths and shortcomings.

“Does the inevitability of death dismiss the possibility that life has meaning?“This question asks us to create peace with death. One way is Marinade, where she is responsible for how she compromised the meaning of life. Another way is to live in gratitude for everything you have been given.