Handling difficult bosses

One of the most common questions we get from participants when we provide leadership The development programme says, “When my manager sets up a bad example, how can I become a good leader?” When your manager is not doing a great job of doing work that is meaningful to you, it can be difficult to make your work meaningful to your own team.

Most Americans are very pleased with their boss (Minkin, 2023), but some of us are stuck with managers who aren’t playing the way we want them to. This puts the middle manager in a tricky position. You are responsible for providing results, motivating your team, and reporting to an unskilled, unaware, or unmotivated boss.

This situation certainly isn’t ideal, but there are steps you can take to affect ineffective bosses and change their bad behavior.

Redirects your boss’s bad behavior

To begin with, it’s important to remember that bad behavior is usually not a sign that someone is a bad person. Your manager may not recognize that they are acting counterproductively, or they may not have had the opportunity to learn good leadership skills.

Too many managers were powerful individual contributors who were thrown into management roles because they were good at their work, not because they were good leaders. Getting closer to challenging behavior with curiosity and compassion can promote productive dialogue that leads to long-term behavioral change (Edmondson, 2019).

The first step to shifting managers’ behavior is to learn what’s most important to them. Identifying their personal priorities and goals allows you to frame your ideas and initiatives in terms of what they care about (Gabarro & Kotter, 2005).

If your boss doesn’t clearly state your priorities, ask open-ended questions.What’s the most important thing this quarter? What does success look like to you?– and propose a plan to document them together. Doing so effectively “teach” your boss to set clearer expectations.

Looking for a change in behavior and opening up with lines like “I know it’s important to hit our numbers this month and I think it will help us get there” will likely be more likely to accept and invest in your suggestions.

We developed the Soar model for these situations. It is loosely based on research from Harvard Law School Negotiation ProgramSoar is an effective way to manage your boss, make changes and board.

Below is an example of how you approach a manager stress It appears that every Monday that we are seeing a new idea about sales numbers that we want our team to follow and engage in frequent micromanagement.

S: Shared Goals

Start by highlighting the goals that both you and your boss care about. If possible, connect ideas, solve problems and advance your top priorities.

“For us all, we know that it’s important to hit our numbers this month, and I think it’ll help us get there.”

O: Opportunity

Build your ideas and initiatives as an opportunity to approach a shared goal. Show us how your ideas can add value not only to your team but also to your boss’ agenda. Use data or past results to strengthen cases and, if relevant, highlight the risk of not taking action.

“Closening our junior sales team at a higher rate will help us get there. Now, we’re giving them too many industries to focus on too many industries. Every week, we feel like we’re adding another KPI that’s causing confusion and unproductive stress, the key market.”

A: Alignment

Invite your boss to the conversation, seeking their perspective. What stands out against them? Do they see potential obstacles? What are they excited about moving their ideas forward?

“What do you think? How do you see this working? What does it take to get you behind this idea?”

R: Results

Write down how you will succeed if you move forward. Define clear outcomes and link them to the shared goals you first identified. Track your progress and propose plans to check in together.

“If this plan works, we expect sales to increase by 20% over the next three months. Are you planning to check in next month to assess your progress?”

Once you agree to the plan, document them all on the same page. Next, throughout the project, communicate proactively and focus on how your boss will deliver on progress you are making and sharing priorities. Ineffective or inexperienced managers may not provide feedback or guidance, but these aggressive updates will prevent surprises and anxiety This can cause managers to micromanage or other unexpected chaos (Gabarro & Kotter, 2005).

Once your project is complete, don’t forget to return the results to the same priorities and goals, build credibility and gain influence. Doing so will consistently remind your boss of what you are offering. Return To old behavior.

Develop important skills

Regardless of your boss’s leadership abilities, Managing Up is an important skill for all employees. In fact, it may be more important Career More successful than how you manage your direct reports. When your boss is not leading well, due to lack of skills or shortages. motivationmanagement is essential.

Managing a team while reporting to ineffective bosses is demanding, but that could also be a proven basis. As leadership coach Whitney Johnson (2018) points out, “Destructive times are seeking destructive leaders.” Intermediate managers who can thrive under imperfect conditions are often stronger, more influential, and better prepared for senior roles.