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We are all familiar with the pain of ambivalence.16 vicious circle Internal conflict, avoidance, rationalizationimpulsive behavior, and self-deprecation Freedom anxiety, Mortality rates, and the limitations of our foresight, can paralyze us and harm our well-being.
Perhaps because of this familiarity we tended to overlook positivity The face of ambivalence. However, over the past decade, researchers have come to recognize the dual nature of Ambialence.13 And highlight the important benefits that being ambiguous can bring.
Better decisions and better solutions
Being ambivalent improves our judgment and leads to more successful problem solving.
As Daniel Kahneman famously demonstrated8, Our thinking relies on two complementary systems. System 1, which I use mostly, is responsive, fast and efficient, as it relies on intuition and rules of thumb. Intestinal emotions. System 1 works well in familiar situations, but bias An error in an unfamiliar situation. That’s the purpose of System 2. It utilizes thoughtful analysis and critical assessment of information and evidence at hand because it requires more effort. One of the most common causes of mistakes in judgment is the tendency to rely on System 1 when System 2 is needed.
Ambivalence causes reasonable and gentle use11 Systematic processing Characteristics of System 2 thinking. It motivates us, allowing us to process the information more thoroughly and carefully, question our assumptions, weigh the merits of discussions that favor our previous options.10,17 (There are even brain imaging studies showing this is happening.3) This creates a better decision and a more reliable connection between the decisions we make and the actions we take.7 And if something interferes with our access system 2? We cannot resolve ambiguity.16
The positive effects of ambivalence decision making However, it is not purely a cognitive phenomenon. The contradictory responses that make up ambivalence include not only positive and negative thoughts about the choices we face, but also positive and negative feelings about them.13 Mixed emotions also play an important role in effective decision-making.
Partly because having conflicting feelings signal us that we are facing particularly complicated situations that we need more. Notecomplex information integration, and slower, more thoughtful deliberations.4 However, the advantages go beyond the activation of System 2 thinking.
Emotional ambivalence increases us Cognitive flexibility. Experienceing conflicting emotions motivates us to be more open to broader information. We tend to consider and balance both positive and negative views of options.5,12 Also, they are usually less likely to respond defensively to potentially threatened feedback.14 You can see yourself more accurately and realistically.15
It also catalyzes emotional ambivalence Metacognitive Strategy: Critical reflection of how successful the strategy to reach a resolution has been and identify changes that may need to be made in the approach. This is closely linked to more effective use Self-regulation process– Ability to set goals, compare their progress with that goal, and make changes to the steps they are taking to reach it. In this way, ambivalence is adamant about increasing adaptability to situations where we find ourselves and finding solutions to our dilemma.5
Finally, emotional ambivalence strengthens us Creativity Problem solved. The relatively unusual and surprising experiences of conflicting emotions make us more accustomed to new connections, unexpected connections, and fresh thinking.4
Strengthened physical and emotional well-being
Regular experiences of emotional ambivalence lead to better health and an increased sense of purpose and meaning in life.
One more surprising finding in ambivalence studies was that people who frequently experienced a mix of positive and negative emotions over the course of a decade showed age-related declines over time compared to those with improved physical health, fewer and less physical symptoms.6 Why does emotional ambivalence make people healthier?
Resilience Facing the stress It is a powerful predictor of physical (and emotional) happiness. Research shows that the people who maintain it are the bereaved families Emotional complexity– the ability to experience positive emotions along with sadness and pain sorrow– Can even deal with deep, painful losses.2 Co-activation model for healthy coping9 We believe that repeated experiences of opposite emotions promote learning “Go with a bad person”– Finding ways to feel better, even in the midst of disappointment and pain. This helps you effectively deal with difficult times by facing negative events head-on, learning from them and actively solving problems rather than avoiding, restraining or becoming overwhelming.
Engaging in activities that promote growth and fulfillment promotes what positive psychologists call eudaimonichappiness– Experience Reliability And prosperity. When we are ambiguous because we are equivalent to values - for example, it is important to care for my children and grow up within me. CareerHowever, pursuing one interfers with pursuing the other. Our mixed emotions motivate us to actively seek ways to balance and integrate conflicts. the goalbrings a greater sense of meaning and purpose.1
Enjoy the benefits of ambivalence
Recognizing that ambivalence has its own rewards may seem like flying in the face of what we know from experience. However, being ambivalent can be a source of tension, anxietyand suffering, it doesn’t have to be that always. How can you make the most of the benefits that ambivalence can offer? The attitudes, skills and actions we can take to make ambivalence uncomfortable, endure and productive are the focus of my next post.
