What parents want: The importance of giving in order to receive

Parents often long for love, appreciation, and meaningful connections with their children. Interestingly, the process of “getting” what they want depends on their ability to “endow” the same qualities on their children. Relationships, especially the interactions between parents and children, highlight that the values ​​instilled by parents and the bonds they foster often return in meaningful ways.

Parents want to feel loved and appreciated. They deeply value expressions of gratitude and love from their children, which strengthen their sense of worth and recognize the sacrifices they have made. They also seek connection and respect through meaningful conversations, shared time, and being treated with dignity. Additionally, parents want to feel valued as role models and want their teachings, values, and life lessons to be recognized and accepted by their children.

Research emphasizes the reciprocal nature of the parent-child relationship. When parents actively provide love, understanding, and respect, they are more likely to receive those same qualities in return. This concept is supported by research on intergenerational relationships, including: gerontologist¹ and Journal of Family Psychology. For example, when parents express unconditional love and support, children learn to respond to those feelings. Emotional warmth from parents builds a foundation of trust and security, and the bond grows stronger as the child grows.

Parents’ acts of gratitude, such as recognizing their children’s efforts and accomplishments, model the importance of: feeling of gratitude. Greater Good Science Center Research² This study shows that gratitude fosters emotional closeness, making it easier for children to express gratitude toward their parents. Similarly, parents encourage mutual respect by respecting their children’s individuality and opinions. Research published in journal of marriage and family³ Emphasizes that respectful communication strengthens family cohesion and strengthens parents’ role as trusted counselors.

The concept of giving in order to receive is rooted in emotional reciprocity. When parents consistently invest in their relationship with their child through time, empathy, and shared experiences, a dynamic is created in which the child naturally wants to return such gestures. Shared experiences deepen connections and create a sense of belonging, leading children to seek out opportunities to relive these moments with their parents. Parents who listen empathetically and affirm their children’s feelings often find the same understanding as they grow older, fostering a mutual support system. Additionally, teaching values ​​such as kindness, respect, and family loyalty will ensure that these qualities are reflected in the way children treat their parents in the future.

For parents, providing love, understanding, and respect is not just about doing your part, it’s also an investment in your relationship. Parents lay the foundation for lasting love and connection by giving what their children want to receive. This cycle of giving and receiving strengthens family bonds and ensures that parents’ emotional needs are met through mutual care and respect. Parents who give thoughtfully and consistently are more likely to receive the same in return, creating a harmonious and fulfilling relationship that benefits both generations.

You can start this year right now by taking these action steps.

• Give a model.
• Limit technology use when family members are together.
• Limit talk about yourself, your work, and other external variables.
• Use props and games like Jenga to encourage playfulness.
• To draw children out and get them talking, focus your discussion on topics that are important to them or have them choose a topic for discussion.
• listen without splitting Note when the children are talking.
• Write letters of gratitude to children at Christmas and show them how it is done.

Essentially, parents who are thoughtful and continually give are more likely to receive the same in return, creating a harmonious and fulfilling relationship that benefits both generations.