Everyone is alone at home during the holidays.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year, my feet, keep your coins in there, you filthy beast!

As a therapist, I have a front row seat to the pitfalls and perils of the holiday season. candy cane toxic positive reaction Be cheerful, happy, and cheerful despite the challenges of living in a world south of the arctic.

And while we’re there, don’t tell Santa I stole this line from a movie: Families are complicated. When you need it most, they tear your heart out and leave you home alone to figure it all out.

That’s why every year I recommend revisiting the Christmas classic about an eight-year-old boy left to fend for himself and unexpectedly becomes the protagonist of a story.

You’d think, like any good psychologist, you’d note Kevin McAllister’s resourcefulness and drive. No, let’s make it worse. Most of the truly magical things are home alone It happens within the first 10 minutes.

Misunderstood, ignored, ridiculed, and despised, Kevin is seen as a nuisance for expressing his feelings. Even through the confusion of not being allowed to watch a movie or trying to find a way to find your own opposing forces. bullying Brother Buzz, Kevin is just trying to make sense of everything he’s noticed.

Why are people busy with their phones? Why are they so quick to judge? Why don’t they try to reveal the full story? And most of all, why are they so shocked when an explosion ruins Christmas when no one is listening?

That’s why they locked Kevin in the attic. Kevin was hopeful that he would finally be able to get what he needed, represented by the plain pizza he specifically requested, but Buzz not only ate the last slice but also mockingly told him that Kevin lost it because he barfed.

When Kevin stands up for himself and speaks truth to power to a distracted and apathetic community – does it still sound familiar after nearly 35 years – in a house of 15 people? He is said to be the only one who has to “cause trouble.”

Many of my clients, and all of us, have to actually make trouble. And holidays are no exception.

The spirit (remember, in Greek it means “soul”) appears only when you descend to the level of the child. Or, if you are a child of God, it happens in a stinky, humble manger. This is far from the shiny, happy-packed Christmas you’d expect.

Kevin’s perfect trip to Paris is ruined when his mother finally comes to her senses. That’s when Kevin, a troublemaker, gently stockings people who brand him powerless, incompetent, and a piece of shit who could feed a tarantula. That’s when the entire McAllister family realized that the people who piss you off the most are the ones you miss the most.

Even if the room is full of people, you’ll be home alone on Christmas. We all relive being ignored, disrespected, and let down by people who really want us. Or at least save a slice!

Kevin frees us from doing a little bit of the bad in order to get to the most truth. We root for him because we root for ourselves, once and for all. Once upon a time, I was a child who just wanted to be listened to. A weak creature who wanted to feel empowered.

That still small voice can be found in places we least expect it. Kevin found it sitting next to Shovel Slayer in South Bend. You’d think Old Man Marley was the proverb from the way he talks to Kevin about the complexities of family. wise Old man. But a moment later, Kevin shows us how to face fear and find the courage to call his estranged son.

Marley transforms and becomes one of the Three Wise Men who visit Kevin McAllister’s own mischievous Christ figure. Who would have thought that our movie devil would become the new angel?

So do many of us. We approach the holidays hoping that everything will be fine, but in reality, we all turn out to be completely wrong.

We are all that child left alone at home and we forget about him too.

This holiday, give your child some grace, whether he or she has been naughty or kind. At this time of year, more than ever, they deserve to be cozy together again.