How to help teens control intense emotions and mood swings

“My 12-year-old daughter used to respond very sweetly when I showed interest in her on a daily basis. Now I feel like she’s going to snap at me right before I open my mouth. I will.”

young teen with intense emotions

Source:jet_po361081/Vecteezy/Used with permission

“Our 15-year-old son started high school this year and is usually a very easy-going kid. He has made some new friends, many of whom we don’t know. Over the past few months he has made some new friends, many of whom we don’t know. , he looks calm one moment, then looks grumpy the next, and when we ask, “Are you okay?”, he just says, “I’m fine!” Please leave me alone! ”

Why do teens experience such intense emotions?

So many things happen during this period puberty. Literally everything is changing: their bodies, their brains, their social expectations, their academic and activity demands. hormone They flood their systems, overactivating the brain’s emotional centers and causing unrecognizable changes in their bodies, impulses, and motivations, while the thinking and organizing parts of the brain lag behind. It is. Adolescence is the period when the brain undergoes the most changes after the first year of life. Teens’ understanding of these changes will be difficult to adapt to, especially while the tools necessary for reasoning have not yet been developed. Emotions of all kinds are prominent and take precedence over logic. Teens are also wired to take risks, but are completely unaware of the consequences. This is by design. The world feels like a scary place and being independent is hard work. If they weren’t designed to be dangerous, they would never grow up and leave our homes.

Is it just a phase or is there a more serious problem?

Know that such intense emotional experiences for teenagers are normal and expected, even if they are of no comfort to exhausted and worried parents. Intense emotions are generally characteristic of adolescents, but in some cases they may be cause for concern. Intense emotions, which are temporary in nature, are different from more widespread mood states, which tend to last for weeks or months and interfere with functioning in one or more areas. Today’s teens are familiar with the language of mental health and may say things like: anxiety I’m out of control,” or even, “I’m so OCD.” These terms may reflect a specific moment in time, the stressors of a situation, or the communication of a need for support. It may or may not mean they are suffering from a clinical problem mood disorder That would minimally warrant evaluation and perhaps treatment by a mental health professional.

Weigh the signs that your teen’s mental health is at risk

mood disorders such as depression; bipolar disorderor general anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, obsessive compulsive disorderor panic disorder, causes symptoms that feel more unbearable, interfere with daily functioning and relationships, and affect physiological processes such as sleep. appetiteand motivation. It is important to observe changes in your teen’s behavior, lifestyle, relationships, involvement in activities, and eating and not eating. sleeping good. Teens may or may not tell their parents or other caring adults that they are suffering for a variety of reasons. Most commonly, people do not express distress for the following reasons:

1. They do not have the words or understanding to express what they are feeling and experiencing.
2. They ask for help or;
3. They believe their concerns may be minimized or ignored.

When teens find the courage to tell a trusted adult that they are hurting and show that they need help, know that they may have been suffering for some time. . In my 30 years of mental health practice with teenagers, I have far more often found that teenagers wait until they are distressed rather than proactively letting their parents know they need support. In these cases, teens may engage in dangerous or unhealthy coping behaviors. suicidal Ironically, it is seen as a way in which their system attempts to alleviate suffering.

Will therapy help?

If teens directly seek help, are at risk, are concerned, or are exhibiting unhealthy coping behaviors, are expressing danger or suicidal thoughts, or are experiencing normal activities. If you notice an unusual lack of interest in or duties, you should seek professional evaluation and treatment. Many families find it most comfortable to start by talking to their trusted family doctor or pediatrician, who can then refer them to a mental health professional. treatment provides a place of support for teens and their parents.

1. Understand the conditions, stressors, and triggers that cause distress.
2. Learn coping skills to deal with distress and restore function.
3. By helping teens meet their needs in healthy ways, we help teens and parents communicate more openly and find effective support at home and at school. .

Therapy can help teens verbalize their inner experiences, be expressive, take responsibility for having their needs met by others, and create a sense of… Masu. self-efficacyunder construction confidence In our ability to learn how to take care of ourselves, emotionally and otherwise. Remember that many things are changing for adolescents at once. Having someone to help you deepen your self-understanding and learn new ways to engage with the world in an environment where honesty trumps judgment can be extremely helpful. There are different approaches to treatment and evidence-based interventions to achieve improvement in various symptoms. Be sure to ask the therapist what type of approach they use, and discuss the goals your teen is trying to achieve and what therapeutic interventions are recommended for the symptoms being treated.

When teens feel acknowledged for their needs, feel supported by their parents, and are connected to appropriate mental health care, what initially seems like a bummer can turn into a great opportunity for growth. There is.

To find a therapist, visit: Psychology Today’s Therapy Directory.